A modest proposal: Tax-deductible donations are a crock . . . pot

Tax-deductible donations are a sham, a shelter for the middle- and upper classes to avoid even more abhorrent taxes on income and capital gains. According to the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review, Congress is considering closing some of the long-standing loopholes that have allowed people to deduct from their taxes the value of the "most amazing flea collection on the planet," $150 worth of bovine semen and a crockpot. (Once the crockpot was found to still contain several helpings of chili, it was quickly retrieved by its owner.)

Even worse than the givers, turns out, are the recipients. First there's the University of Pittsburgh administrator who endorses congressional action as a means to ensure "that the United States government gets . . . its fair share" of our money. And then there's this dreadful ingrate:

Seton Hill University received a bequest of 34 [works of art] from benefactor Clay Frick Lynch in the 1970s.

The etchings, which include works by Rembrandt, Millet and Whistler, are displayed in the president's office.

"Just the idea that I can get up from my desk and get a closer look is comforting," said Seton Hill President JoAnne Boyle.

Unfamiliar with both Seton Hill and its art-therapy patient cum president JoAnne Boyle, I Googled her and quickly found another splendiferous quote:

"Academic programs and majors come and go, but if you look at the history of American higher education, you'll see that one constant is football."

A . . . I . . . Ah. Argh . . . Ah . . .? Ha . . . What??? [Just a moment. I have to get up from my desk and a get closer look at my tax-deductible Picasso depiction of the New England Patriots' first Super Bowl victory or I think I'm going to have a stroke.]

Well, I thought the only constants were death and taxes. Speaking of which, the government should have no role in the enterprise of giving just as it should have no role in taking any of our hard-earned income through taxation.